“I think you need to know this,” This came from Kirsty, my acquaintance, (wouldn’t as much call a friend). Was to my surprise, did I have a reason to accept her friendship? Is this yet another chance to heartbreak one who had feelings for me? My heart pounding; or what medics would call, dysrhythmias. “I was eager to know what aspect of you made people hate you. I wanted to have a taste of your bad side, that people talk about.”
Maybe I should explain about Kirsty. She is a fourth year pursuing the same course with me. She is however one year ahead of me. Today is her las day in school, after sitting for her final exams. We had to wave good bye, after a long day of service to community’s health. She was my golf team player.
I have grown up to be a sole fighter, and the defence to justice. As it is life, I have lost several battles, had my name tarnished, forced to step down my leadership positions, not to leave out moves to bring down my activities in the community. All this was evident to me, every evening I’d ask myself whether the pain was all worth.
Kirsty was a humble Swahili lady, an empowered youngster ready to fight her way out. I was however introverted not to let her into my private life. But within 6 months, she had a good experience of who I am. Kirsty was one I had developed trust with, and for this, I’d not think what her reason was.
“There’s much that I have learnt from you. You aren’t who they say you are.” Really? I was grinning, a smile I make when am more confused to say anything. “I just think you have something they are afraid of. They are not happy to the moves you make, ‘coz of your continued success.” I thought this was enough to me. Am strong but again humane hence subject to emotions. I ran short of words, but silence speaks too. To date I believe my hug to her spoke on my behalf.
Left in a pool of thoughts, pitch dark mind. I now had my answer; It was all worth the pain . Only a bare road leads to the desert, a rugged hilly and grassy path is a way to the mountains. The drive to keep growing and remain ambitious has been the bloodiest combat I ever made, but the results have always kept me going.
As I write this piece, am taking up new roles, roles to be a trainer of trainees, to inspire, motivate and more so bring up leaders with a passion. I have had teary days, days I was weak and ready to give up. Had days I pulled out with an intent to let the antagonism have their way in. But I have always come back resilient, valiant, and better.
“So, this is my life, And I want you to know that I am both happy and sad and am still trying.” Dr. *Nikki Martinez*